


the unexpected disapperance of the ponds.

by agirlkillsgod



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series), Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Dialogue Heavy, Episode: s07e05 The Angels Take Manhattan, Gen, Humor, Inspired by Twitter, YouTube, even though it's a true crime episode, written like an episode of supernatural
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:28:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26949748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agirlkillsgod/pseuds/agirlkillsgod
Summary: The episode opens with a montage; a cobalt car door, a strange angel statue, a bizarre book, a ghostly gravestone, and an ardent afterword. Then, the camera pans to Shane Madej and Ryan Bergara in their usual office, excited smiles out of place with the trademark sounds of shattering glass, a screaming siren and a swinging light fixture.“In this week on BuzzFeed Unsolved, we investigate the unexpected disappearance of British model and journalist Amelia Pond, and her husband, Rory Williams. Today, in honour of the new season, we are going to be going to their gravestone to have a look ourselves.”
Relationships: Ryan Bergara & Shane Madej
Comments: 3
Kudos: 47





	the unexpected disapperance of the ponds.

The episode opens with a montage; a cobalt car door, a strange angel statue, a bizarre book, a ghostly gravestone, and an ardent afterword. Then, the camera pans to Shane Madej and Ryan Bergara in their usual office, excited smiles out of place with the trademark sounds of shattering glass, a screaming siren and a swinging light fixture. 

“In this week on BuzzFeed Unsolved, we investigate the unexpected disappearance of British model and journalist Amelia Pond, and her husband, Rory Williams. Today, in honour of the new season, we are going to be going to their gravestone to have a look ourselves.”

With an emphasised New York accent Shane says, “yes, sir, yes we are.”

Rolling his eyes, Ryan continues, “This case is somewhat new, having only happened in twenty-twelve. Due to Amelia’s rising fame, it was subject to lots of media coverage and even more conspiracy theories, the Internet and tabloids alike eating up the preposterous story.”

Then, the screen fades to black, only to open on a lowly saturated image of the young couple.

Ryan’s voice starts, and the image begins to glow. “Amelia Pond and Rory Williams, who had been married for approximately two years and were, by all known accounts, more than happy, took an abrupt trip to New York City, mere days before Amelia’s photoshoot with  _ Elle _ .”

The screen changes to a picture of Central Park, with a sketch of the Winter Quay in the left corner. Ryan’s words appear on the screen in typewriter-font: “CCTV shows Rory walking away from where the pair was picnicking with a supposed family friend, and he is last seen in a coffee shop near the Angel of the Waters statue.”

_ maybe - maybe he just went to the wrong coffee shop _

_ (wheezes) _

“Amelia is last seen running towards a blue police box with the aforementioned family friend, leaving the picnic basket alone with the afterword of  _ Melody Malone: Private Detective in Old New York Town _ still inside. More on them later.”

_ this sounds more like a fairytale than a missing persons case _

_ funny you would mention that…  
_ _ it only gets weirder _

The image fades away to reveal Ryan and Shane sitting in the back of a car, clad in long coats and dark scarfs, a clear jab at Sherlock’s famous  caricature. The sun shines in on them, poking in through the windows.

“I feel ridiculous,” Shane says.

“These outfits were your idea!” The way that Ryan’s voice pitches jerks a laugh out of Shane, but Ryan brushes it off. “We are on our way to Central Park, the last place the Ponds were seen together. No bodies were ever found and, despite their notability and growing social media following, no trace was ever left. And with that, let’s get into some theories.”

“Whoopie gee!”

**THEORY ONE** , the screen flashes.

“They died on the way across.-”

“That seems fairly believable.”

“-But this theory does, arguably, have the least amount of evidence. No airport has any record of a Rory Williams or Amelia Pond buying a ticket for that day. Their joint bank account, tabloids announced, had no records of such a purchase, either. Furthermore, there are no reports of a plane going missing or crashing on the day.”

“Family refused to comment on this anomaly and no one was able to get a hold of their childhood best friend, Mels Zucker. Funnily enough, no record of her could be found besides primary school tests.”

_ well how did they get to the states? _

_ magic? _

_ oh yes _ _  
_ _ with their british broomsticks  
_

_ I wonder if they spilt their tea on the ride _

_ or dropped their crumpets _

_ (wheezes) _

The pair clamber out of the car. Despite it being no later than three-p.m., the graveyard is dark. The ground beneath whispers stories through dying weeds and bones. It’s cold, and Shane is suddenly glad for the dramatic clothing. He pretends not to notice the clouds brimming with rain. Across from where they stand, a gravestone reads ‘ _ In loving memory. Rory Arthur Williams. Aged 82. And his loving wife. Amelia Williams. Aged 87. _ ’

**THEORY TWO,** the screen reads.

“A crazed fan,” Ryan says.

“Ooh, I love me a crazed fan,” Shane grins.

“It is important to note that the Ponds could certainly take care of themselves, but it does not rule out the possibility of foul play. It was reported that Amelia dealt with many love letters and stalkers, the boldest of which actually came to her house once. Authorities questioned the man who remains anonymous as their initial lead, but the trail eventually came up cold when he revealed nothing helpful or worrisome.

“While it is still possible that an obscure fan could have done this, it still plagues the question of the bodies’ location. Authorities combed both Central Park and their homes back in England and nothing was found. CCTV and social media were checked intensely and still, no evidence was found.”

“Well. This is certainly a positive case!”

**THEORY THREE** , the screen flashes.

“Right, stay with me for this one. This theory is famous on many forums online and involves time tra-” Shane’s laugher is unmistakable and loud. “-vel. People say that the blue box Amelia was seen getting into is a time machine and something happened, leaving the couple stuck in the past. Once again, family and friends refused to comment.

“While it explains how the afterword in  _ Melody Malone: Private Detective in Old New York Town _ was written by her, and how the gravestone says their names, it’s pretty unlikely.”

“But it’s pretty unlikely.”

“Yes.”

“I mean, time travel? Really?”

“Well, the Ponds were very outspoken about aliens and all of that. Plus, there’s  _ Summer Falls _ , a book written by one Amelia Williams,  _ from _ the fifties.”

“It’s a fairly common name.”

“I’m not saying I believe it, it’s just one of a million theories.”

“Where do aliens tie into all of this?”

“Well- conspiracy theorists believe that the blue box is manned by an alien,” Ryan finds himself smiling now, too, despite the location and topic. The impossibility of the situation has gotten to him.

“See, it sounds ridiculous!”

The camera pans over the gravestone and the infamous statue watching it. Its lifeless stare is regretful, hand outstretched and closed around air for seemingly no reason at all. It’s eerie, but nothing more than marble.

“It just doesn't make sense.”

“I’m staring right at the gravestone, Ryan, it’s nothing weird.”

“In the end, it appears we’ll never know what truly became of Amelia Pond and Rory Williams. Whether it be machine, human, or alien error, the case remains… unsolved.”

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> inspired by [this](https://twitter.com/wlwpond/status/1314939999062818823) tweet and [this](https://brcken-keys.tumblr.com/post/631614340479565824/doctor-who-buzzfeed-unsolved-the-mysterious) gif set!
> 
> sorry if any of it feels out of character or short! i wanted to take the trope and flip it upside down, give it a spin in the supernatural-style, but i don't know how well it turned out oops.
> 
> you can find me on twitter (@riversmikaelson)!
> 
> comments & kudos feed me so don't be shy


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